Monday, June 12, 2006

Head over heels

wtf! why am i getting jealous over something that is not right? sh*t! Suppose to be i should be happy for the two of you! God!!! Why am i getting head over heels for you? man!!! why am i feeling like this?! You're killing me. Slowly, inch by inch. God!!! I thought everything was very fine then until one day i woke up thinking everything is still ok but so sad it's not. Don't worry, I have this "little" optimism. I'll try to understand everything. I'm a happy person. Loneliness has no place inside my heart esp. when I'm with people that are very close to my heart. I'm a stage actor here. Remember? I know where to place myself i know when and when not to bring my problems. I know that doing something that will lead me to eternal life will not solve my problem(s). I just hate the time when I do nothing. My mind is free and you fill those empty spaces which makes me feel I'm too immature. Have i been that bad? All this years, all this time, I was fooled by so much illusion. I've been so idealistic and not realistic. I have accepted the whole you. so fool am i! I'm the BIG loser again. Haha. Here i am gain. Laughing with all this things which makes me think I'm really insane. Freaky insanity leads me to nowhere. Gotta keep myself busy now. Thank God for all the hectic schedule. Keep me more busy. Give me a 24-hour sched. Don't ever let me sleep for in my dreams, an empty sheet of my mind is filled again. God, I'm dying!!!! waaahhhhh!!!!



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